It's been a while.

Howdy!  I hope everyone is doing well. :) It’s springtime and everything is awesome.  I write to you tonight, on Sunday, April 18th.  School is winding up so that it can wind down in about two weeks.  I am having a couple of my busiest weeks these next two weeks, but I’m ready, BRING ‘EM ON!  Five weeks until finals week.  I’m ready to duke it out with the last month of my freshman year of college.  It’s so funny how fast it’s gone.  I remember thinking last year about how I was going to think it was weird to be in college, but it has felt just as natural as any other transition in my life.  It’s another one of those things that you psych yourself up for, only to forget how big of a deal it is when you get caught up in all that goes on.  You never really have time to stop and think, “Wow, I’m in college.”  That is, you don’t really have time unless you write about it like I am currently.  I love just being able to write without really having a topic to write about.  I love conversing with WordPress as if it’s a friend I haven’t talked to in months.  I am just writing without anything in particular in mind.  I have found that whenever I actually try to think about something to write, I don’t write.  So tonight, I just decided to sit down and start typing.  I have some free time and figured, “Hey, what the heck, let’s just sit down, and write.”  I say “let’s” subconsciously because I probably have some kind of split-personality thing going on, or I may just not know how to write correctly.  Or maybe it’s a stylistic thing… I dunno.

I am excited for summer.  Yet, I am apprehensive about it all the same.  Last summer was a summer that will take a while to top, so, while this one may be bittersweet, I still want to enjoy it as much as possible.  I just wanna lay under the stars, and praise God for his creation that is so fearfully and wonderfully made, then go lay under the glow-in-the-dark stars in my room as I fall asleep.  I wanna drive through Fort Wayne with my window down blaring Hot Air Balloon as if nothing matters.  I wanna play frisbee until my feet fall off.  I wanna read books in the hot sun until I fall asleep.  I wanna sit on the front porch, eat strawberries and watermelon and enjoy the summer air, all while not caring that mosquitoes are using me as the local watering hole.  I wanna go on walks while just thinking about Christ and the love he has for me, regardless of my faults.  I am excited for summer.  Yeah, I’m excited.  Just listening to Strawberry Avalanche right now by Owl City is making me remember warm air, the smell of pizza that was constantly on my clothing, and awesome summer nights.  I want it all back… and it’s all only five-ish weeks away.  So close.

This summer, I will be working at B. Antonio’s pizza like I have the past couple of years.  In addition to that, I will be a teacher’s assistant in a summer school for about a month.  I can’t wait to work with kids all day, it’s gunna be awesome, yet extremely tiring all the same.

I have plenty of summer reading ahead of me.  I have recently completed Forgotten God by Francis Chan, and am currently working More than a Carpenter by Josh and Sean McDowell and Don’t Waste Your Life by John Piper.  For this summer, I have a number of books by Pastor Mark Driscoll to read:  The Radical Reformission, Vintage Jesus, and Doctrine.  I can’t wait to get them started, sooo ready.

(Ah, Bird and the Worm… such a good one, a very summery song… For all my pals who live in the oceans and the seas… with friends like these, well, who needs enemies!?)

I think I want to show you guys an excerpt from my newest assignment in my Intro to Creative Writing class.  Here is the first page-ish.  If you wanna read the rest of it, feel free to message me on Facebook, and we can talk.

Loss

I am the most selfish, proud person I know, and you can’t take that away from me.  It’s my natural, sinful nature.  I would like to say I cannot help it, but that would be a cop-out, true as it may be.  I cannot help it, but my pursuit of Christ can.  Never can I use my inability to change my life as a legitimate reason for not changing.  Thinking I could change my life on my own would be proud, but using my depravity as an excuse is selfish.

Escaping the life-sucking tsunami of selfishness and pride that devours even the most devout is difficult.  It is nearly a Catch-22.  One who is selfish and proud does not recognize his selfishness, primarily due to his pride.  He would never recognize the problem on his own, and he is often too proud to seek wise counsel.  Not to mention that, even after being counseled by the wise, he would be too proud and selfish to acknowledge his mistake and change his ways for the sake of others.

“What is the point of worrying about something that is possibly impossible to solve?”  one may ask.  To him I would reply, “The problems that often seem the most difficult to solve are the ones that have the deepest roots in our lives, and cause the most trouble in our pursuit of Christ.”  I spend so much time trying to prevent myself from acting sinfully.  I keep cursing to a minimum, I try not to worship anyone or thing instead of God, I try to love my neighbor as myself.  But the more I keep trying, the more I keep failing.  And the more I keep failing, the more I keep shaking my fist at God for making me rely on him for my sanctification, as if I think I have the authority to make myself more holy.  I am a bad person, and my Savior is the only good thing about me.

———–

That’s the beginning of my creative non-fiction piece for my Creative Writing class.  I like it, it was good to write.  I am currently working on our next assignment, a poetry project.  We have to write about five pages of poems.  I am making progress.  It’s due in about two weeks.

DUDE!  GUESS WHAT!!! I’m playing TENNIS now!  I LOVE IT!  I used to play a super long time ago, but I just kinda stopped.  I started playing about a week ago and I realized I’m not horrible at it.  I think playing ping pong helps me out some.  I bought my own racquet and I am looking for someone to play in the summer!  Contact me on FB to play!  I really wanna play a lot this summer!  :)

I should probably bring this post to a close, as it is getting rather long.  A couple of prayer requests:  please pray that I continually look for ways to love others better.  I am not awesome at loving everyone.  So please pray that I see people as Christ sees them and that I love them accordingly.  Secondly, please pray that despite the busyness of the next two weeks, I continue to pursue Christ more than I pursue my school work.  Please let me know if there is any way I can pray for any of you.  Thanks guys.  I love you all.  And for those of you at home, see you in a few weeks.  I miss you guys.

-Chris

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